My name is Jackie Weaver and I have been through the grief process many times before too - I also had felt like my heart has been smashed into a thousand pieces having lost my beloved pets / animals over the years and was guided to write a book to help people through the journey of Pet Grief. I know the feeling of acceptance as most of my pets made old age however, I also have experienced the pain and shock of losing a couple so very young. I wish I had known some of the coping strategies that I know now.
Through my own near death experience (surviving what should have been terminal cancer), I have been honoured with the ability to connect to animals' minds, living and in spirit. However, that is not the basis of my book at all. You do not even need to believe in that side of things to understand it and benefit from it.
Over the years I have become known as 'The Animal Psychic'. I have written several books and appeared on many television shows. On ITV This Morning I was a guest expert to help people who were suffering with grief of losing their pet. I am proud to share my knowledge and help with you.
Pet Loss, Pet Bereavement, Animal Grief are all the same thing and whatever term you use, it hurts and seems so totally unbearable at the time.
Dealing with pet grief is hard and, as the title suggests, it can be 'Before and After'. I know that so many people really do need help with through this bereavement process.
On the cover, is my darling collie Sally. She, like many pets in their senior years, got various ailments and even suffered strokes. We love our pets that much and when we know that they are maybe not long for this Earth, it can be so heart wrenching. This can be like a grieving process all on it's own. Even when there is nothing wrong with our pets, we can be so devoted, that we focus on the worry of what if something happens to them! It is natural as we are humans and we have emotions - some emotions that serve us well, and some that are not so helpful, even dibiliating.
In the book, there are practical mental techniques which I have been shown and taught. For example: did you know that you can use your breathing, tap / drum your fingertips on one specific area or your body and truly lower your feeling of stress? It really does work and simple to do too.
I also wish to empower you to have the strength to speak up when you need to, afterall, they are your pets and you should be be allowed an opinion. If you can be in a stronger emotional state of mind, even if you find yourself in an panic medical situation for example, this will be of benefit to your pet / animal and your peace of mind. We cannot avoid the distress of many things however, imagine if we could reduce it by having some things and thoughts pre-organised to help us when we need them. At the time of upset, your mind will have a useful infomation bank to draw on, so you feel more in control and can focus your love on your animal without extra added confusion.
Dealing with an unexpected death can be so very painful, to say the least. This is Stan, my little cat who sadly died in 2013 as he was hit by a car. To say I was devastated, was an understatement.
One of things our minds often do, is to keep showing us those last pictures that we really do not want to keep re-visiting. I have often said to my clients, that if this happens, instruct your mind to give you a good memory instead. The more often you do that, in the end, the mind does what you want as... it has formed a new habit of a good memory to show! Now that may surprise you but yes, our minds are that clever, they form habits to help you.This can be from as simple as how to brush your teeth - you do not need to think what side you and start and where you go next. Very handy, but not so helpful when your mind keeps repeating what you don't want know / see.
We really can instruct our minds to help us and form good habits. You may be surprised to know or realise this - I certainly was! However, now I know, I use it to help me to do the best for me.
In the book there are actually two techniques to help with this. (One for the sad 'end' vision and the other when you have experienced seeing something traumatic.) Also, who has ever had it said to them, 'It was just a pet.'? Those words can make you feel like you have been stabbed in the heart. However, with some mental preperation, should this ever occur, you are far less likely to feel the hurt as your mind will give you exactly what you should think at the time of that upsetting, and quite frankly, unhelpful statement. I would class it as insenstive, but some people say things without realising the pain they cause, or because they have not had wonder of animal love as we have.
Having experienced not the most straightforward of lives myself, fortunately through my learning curve of life I met some amazing and informative people. They, like me, want to help peoples' suffering and by sharing knowledge this helps achieve that. I found out that there are techniques that we can use to help us with our suffering, panic, stress etc. These are not only for grief but tips to help us in everyday life too. Afterall, life can be a challenge for many of us, some to a lesser or far greater extent. I do not claim to be a professional therapist / councellor or suchlike. I have my own job helping animals and their owners. I wanted to share the many different ways that has helped me and others, so that your grief journey may be a kinder, smoother one. This being said, please be assured that I have had the contents and advice scrupulously checked.
Here are is the table of contents to give you a guide to things that I have covered in the book. I know from feedback that by sharing my experiences and learnings, it is really helping others. I am not one for complicating things, I have written it clearly and easily with diagrams to explain things. Here are some of them. They may well get you thinking...
These are all to do with how our minds works, and then how to use it in our favour to make our lives, and the grieving process, smoother.
Anyone can follow them as the book explains how as it is a self help for pet grief combined with much more too.
I feel so blessed to do the work I do, although my journey has been far from easy to get here.
Apart from having cancer back in 2005, which was a battle in itself, the rest of my life had pretty testing times too. I now see these as lessons and if more 'tests' appear, then I shall look for the lessons in them too.
I have always been able to 'hear' animals and fortunately my illness brought it to the fore once again. (Every cloud and all that - Animal Communication is the best silver lining ever!)
I have put my head above the parapet so many times as I am passionate about what I do.
Animals need a voice, and I can give them one.
This has led me on a journey from magazines, to radio then on to televison. Incredibly, I have been on more TV shows than any other UK Animal Communicator.
I am the only person to have a Celebrity book published of all genuine readings and given permission to share. My idea was that if celebrities were willing to share their communications in print, then this would hopefully help animal communication to be more acceptable, as it has! The postscript is even by an Emmy Award winning actor!
If you you would like to find our more about my world of animal communication, www.animalpsychic.co.uk is my actual website.
This is not my main website, this one is soley to give you the chance to give you an insight into my grief book.
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On YouTube is now a short video to give you the outline of my book.
If you are grieving for a pet, or worried about that time that is to come, I hope that my efforts will help make life easier for you.